My dearest little boy,
The world is a pretty amazing place when you've only existed in it for 5 and a half months. The littlest things, a light switch, a colourful blanket, a tissue, are completely captivating to you. Every walk down the hallway of our home is a new adventure for you. You reach out to touch things - the bookshelf, the picture frames - and I bring you to them, and tell you what they are. This is a picture of your daddy and I in Morocco... one day we'll take you there. That is a painting I did when we first moved up here. Those are all your mommy's recipe books... one day I'll teach you how to cook and to appreciate wholesome food.
At 5 and a half months you are more present in your body. You can sit up (with help), roll over, and even take tiny steps when we stand you upright. But with new found physical strength and stability comes new found frustrations as well.
It must be hard being trapped in that little body of yours - everything just out of reach, always so frustratingly dependent on others. There is so much you want to do, to taste, to experience... I can see it in your eyes, in your body language. You are an old soul, my dear Zachary, stuck in a baby's body... but be patient, my love. The world will be yours for the taking soon enough.
At 5 and a half months you are such a joy in my life. You make me burst out into laughter with your silly sounds and smiles - and you know that you are being funny - and you love that. And still, sometimes, you make me cry too. Although those moments are becoming more and more rare. In fact, you make me feel everything more. My heart is bigger now, and I feel the entire world's sadness and happiness more deeply now, because of you.
I guess that’s what motherhood is all about.
You make me strive to be a better person, to make this world a better place.
You are my teacher just as much as I am yours.
(photos from this photoshoot we did with my neighbour up north)